The past year Going through your calendar Go through last year’s calendar week by week. If you see an important event, family gathering, friendly get-together or a significant project, write it down here

January Finished off snowglobe with Tammy, that was fun, we lazed out and only saw some of the artists, had pizza. Weekend of 5th, after teppenyaki with alex and kristin and those guys, spent 2 days motorcycling around SF looking at apartment with gino. I think i was mildly sick, crashed at his place. I remember thinking i’d be down to just live at that apartment, thank god id idn’t . we also went out for drinks and I was TURBO drunk, probably because sick or just sleepy. Holy shit, week after that did lasik preop, then sat 27th went and saw whose line is it anyway, after I had a birthday party on that friday… then lasik I guess on Sunday? Cried at lasik place, was walked home through BART and etc with Tammy, then sat in pain at home and smoked weed to make it better We went to scala’s bistro that tuesday night on my bday, which unfortunately was not that great

February

Still wearing protective shields from my lasik 15th, shitload of work meetings and desk shifting? Don’t remember. Muse had a new song released, then we did an all hands. There was an HR alumni panel as well that I don’t remember, and a work tahoe trip that never happened. Looks like I “picked up a painting,” don’t remember that at all. I also saw a dr mnoica shaw, don’t remember at all.

March Motorcycle classes first weekend with tammy and gino, pretty proud of her. One friday went to a Haus party, god only knows. I think that waws the cold one with tammy’s big ol white dude friendwith fratboy crowd. 16th, we fly to japan, which i guess caused us to miss a camping trip. Osaka, kyoto, tokyo. We rented motorcycles and i drove it freezing my fingers off, and had to pee really bad. Also got up in the snow in hakkone - was it? And dodging pedestrians in shinjuku. Awesome trip, so many pictures, I still haven’t finished editing the picture lol. 27th, I have “emily” written down, no idea wtf that means Looks like i had a talk with someone from aiesec that probably went nowhere April Started my NERT training, every monday. That was ok, I probably should review my thing. Looks like I went to a whateverglades show that first friday, and then did comicon and afkgg with christa, kristin, and tammy. Probably was on the motorcycle and couldn’t drink. Got dim sum the next day with i think steph and brendan, then a craft festival, then the wine bar. Busy saturday, should have more like it. Talked about zio patch with some peeps, that right, those guys were hitting me up for ages. 12th, riley visits for the weekend, just for a weekend, looks like i tried to find meetups or something for us. I had to move my motorcycle on the 19th, god knows why, and then another whateveglade show i don’t think i made. I went camping on the 21st? Hosewarming party on the 28th, after nate’s going away party. Couple random tinder dates sprinkled throughout, meh. Looks like I had started my drum lessons, possibly the month prior? I was much more excited about it back then.

May First saturday is yingyings bday, we drove all the way down to san jose for it and vowed to never do that again. I think we tried to catcha cinco de mayo something, maybe with gino? IS that when i left my motorcycle key in my bike for a while at the MIssion, and Mike Storm was crying about his GF while we got thai with gino and crew? Anyway, next day, hiked with alex. Don’t remember where. Weekend fo 11th tammy goes out of town, probably for that canada trip with lieman. IoT world the week after, I probably went with the intern. Friday the 18th we had a reservation at basil canteen, dunno what for, oh, dany’s birthday? No, that’s the day after, i have nert graduation on the saturday, and then dinner, and then laser tag. I think we limebiked to the dinner. ANother bay to breakers we didn’t go to A democrats meetup, that was ook, basically sf politics 101, and then a single diary entry on wednesday about tammy, drums, codefor america, hah i probably went all of 4 times this year. IoT world debreif at work, then david’s bbq that last weekend Oh, nope, previous out of town was for tammy to go to idaho to check out house stuff, then she goes out of town that last weekend in may for the mei’s bachelorette party

June Another democrat thing but i din’t go to it Sun3rd, a bbq? Don’t remember it. On the 9th saturday, a wine and cheese thing. Next day, my first student recital. I played some system of a down, I believe. Hung out at cycle gear afer, i think we got tammy some stuff, i may have got a new jacket Vegas for crystal’s birthday, that was good, got in cheap to a pool party Hackreactor mentor mixer, my mentee awful lol

July Independence day camping? I don’t remember that too well… oh, that might be when we went to the observatory? Aunt julie came, saw the car accident that really fucked me up for a lot of the year, roya nd isabelle there too. Also got yelled at in an in n out Next week, parents visit. Also my new laptop came! ( that was mentioned as apossible purchase in my last year compass). Love that thing so much. Also saw the pillows! Super fun. First talk with Jenny. All while parents are here. I hope they had fun. Apparently they were frustarted about a day being wasted cause tammy wanted to hang around. I missed pedro’s birthday the last weekend because of the anglehack hackathon - that was good fun, i should hit those peeps up again. Man, only one hackathon in 2018? Durn.

August I thinkt he bubble study happened at some point this month, russian lady was leaving, aww Went to vegas for defcon, had WAY more fun than the year p rior. Think i told people at civic hack nighta s well, also did a great presentation to hack reacotr. The weed startups and etc, i meant to look more into the turning yeast into weed stuff, very walkaway inspiring.. Shame Then, hawaii, this is the beginning of me getting fat :/ though at some point this montrh i began the much more straightforward, simpler workout. Rampup time on it, didn’t hit all the lifts, but started then. I thought I had started getting fat much later… perhaps the crash through me off more than i realized? Jack came in town for a bit, beleive we went and got some drniks with his friends Big old san francisco extend family dinner for david and mei’s thing Drove motorcycles around hawaii, that was awesome. Some VERY hot hikes though

September First, headed to Houston for josh and anette’s weading, IAH was a bad decision… only there for through tuesday, i thik tammy left early? Can’t remmber, Then BOOM a google fphone interview that i really shoudln’t have passed - cheated hella, had a browser tab open and the guy was chinese and was basically filling my anwers in for me. I thought I had pushed this back more but perhaps not. Looks like this may be when layoffs happened, wild. THen some sort of brewing event on saturday all the way out in oakland, way too many tots. Rmemeber feeling fat, and getting bored super fast. Janice talking about finding a enw job. Tammy has some sunday event titled “rehearsal,” no idea what that is - prooobably the drum thing we skipped. Then, 21st, friday, life is beautiful! Headed out to vegas, that was good fun. VIP, felt rich AF, definitely worth it. Saw a fantastic set by justice, I should try to find some of those new songs. They looked so cool up there on stage… maaaan. Great time. Lost my vape pen though, that sucked. Old vegas was nice. Last day was a bit hectic, mostly tryign to work in little cafes, impossible to walk around in vegas. End of month did some sort of google workshop, at this point full on studying and no longer studying berkely AI stuff, straight focusing on google hardcore. That weekend, startup escape room, fun. Then, virtual self, OK but would have been better not to. Then, sunday, berkely with tammy’s friends, that was fun but cold towards the end. Saw that weird patagonia fight in line for the cello show.

October FLeet week the first weekend, lots of watchign of planes, went and visited a big old boat with gino and eric, so this must be after we all camped? No… before… cause we did the roof watching and picnic thing and talked about how we wanted to camp. Trying to get new friends, despeartely. Also had interesting conversations with those marines. Weekend after that, tim finnigan came! Don’t remember doing too much out of the oridnary, got high and went to dolores for sure, maybe a hike? Definitely a hike, oh yea, somewhere near presidio, and rented bikes as well, he was so cool but way too timid. Alex’s birthday, we did karaoke I think? I think i bombed that hing bad, abbay there and clearly bored. I wonder if i wished jessica a birthday? Also mei’s birthday that weekend, which we missed because… why… I was doing something? Early monday morning bombed a triplebyte interview, turned out the feedback was pretyt generic. Oh, tammy was in Japan this whole time, perhaps the previous weekend I was doing somethign for halloween - like trying to find the motorcyc ride :( Lots of interviews rolling in at this point

November Pendulum, that was… ok…. Energy for concerts diminishign. TONS of interviews this month, my god, i just had them lined up one after the other. Tammy’s birthday! Escape room and dinner, IIRC. What did I get her? I don’t even remember. Jesus, so many interviews. 18th sunday, idaho freindshp thanksgiving thing, that was ok, though Id on’t connect to those kids much. The camping trip with eric and kristin and christa, where the girls forgot their tent poles, must have happened by now. Slept cozy in my udnerquilt (which was mentioned in my previous yearcompass!) Gino has left for taiwan towards the end of the month, which iw as very fomo about Cooked thanksgiving dinner for tammy’s family, her dad loved it, start to finish flawless execution Then, friendsgiving at steph’s house. Tammy and i sick AF, mostly sat at home that whole weekend playing zelda, which i had gotten back into and she loved watching me play.

December Personal capital holiday party, really liked meeting eric. The night before, tammy and I had skipped ksabo just to saty inside and play zelda. Another drum recital, played rage and system, went good though took a long time to get on, and i missed a shitload of drum lessons after. Then, EI holiday party, at t hat dank car place. At this point I have been turned down by google, bubmed about that but still job hunting. EI party kinda depressing, nothign really exciting happening, maybe be ause all the sales peopel ahve been fired? We got to tahoe! Wow, busy, interviews too. I enjoy skiing, I claim more than snowboarding, but in hindsight, with the nearly breaking of the knee, skiing was a bit fucky. Might try snowboarding again to see how far i can get Head to houston for christmas, 9 days, perhaps too much. Treat tammy too fragially, i don’tk now why, we have a fight about it and it comes to a head and gets solved well - she wants to win back her confidence, i need to treat her less fragile. Lots of fun with family, riley and co. Graham unfortunately seeming to have paranoid delusions. SPend new years at odesza show that I was kinda bored at but still enjoyed being with tammy for. Stressed because next day (today) had to do family photos 9am. Lacking of sleep. Must catch up.

This is what my last year was about What aspects were the most important to you in the following areas last year*? Which happenings or events were the most significant? Summarize briefly. personal life and family Had some good conversations with tammy, re: treating her fragially, not being a dick, not criticizing, etc. Mom starfished on the couch during dr mario, heard more transparently her and dad, got feedback from riley on riley and them’s experience with tammy. Moved in with Gino, worked somewhat hard to make new friends, but need to work harder. Had a great halloween party. Every time I went out, I’d make friends. Should continue that energy. Saw a therapist for a bit, that was enlightening.

work, studies, profession Work feels mildly disappointing at the tail end, perhaps because I’ve spent so much of the last 3 months looking for new work. I know I got some good things done, I just can’t remember off the top of my head - I feel like 2017 was probably a better year for work. I did get tons of new studying done in preparation for google interview, which makes me feel like I had been slipping, not taking studying stuff as hard. Stayed on top of japanese flashcards but didn’t make as much language progress as i’d like I like that i learned some new knots I l ike that I targetd Go and did great work on the first project for berkely AI I think I did really well prepping quick for google, and feel much more confident now I like that I revamped my website and am now targeting web brutalism in general I liked defcon The job search was elucidating one way or the other, rejections in particular

belongings (home, objects) Looks like i hit all my targets from the previous year - underquilt, new laptop, some casual motorcycle gear (purchased too early). Probably again bought too much, but did get some sick camping gear, and problem wasn’t nearly as bad as 2017. Didn’t spend nearly as much on weed, either. New laptop - dank, super excited about it Lots of great new books, fiction and non I think we got new speakrs this year which was nice Tail end, organizational tools awesome, and some great christmas gifts like the solar lamp thing Some warm clothes Underquilt, yay. Sea to summit stuff, yay. New sheets, (lol, like in previous year compass) Had to rebuy motorcycle jacket, ugh. But, nice jacket. Tammy got me a helmet, yay relaxation, hobbies, creativity Tammy and I kicking it and playing zelda, very nice. That game is a masterpiece. Drumming kicked off, that has been fun, though torwards the end not as focused as I like I feel disappointed in this category a lot towards the end of the year, in terms of creativity especially Mostly hobies have been coding and gaming I feel almost like I mya have relaxed too much At least i kept my plants alive, and now I have bonsai to work on as well

friends, community Great halloween party, and now I”m a NERT, so I guess there’s that. Met some cool people at dance, I should follow up I need work here Tammy’s friends are cool, and I got closer to Ayu and Eric and Mike Storm, but this whole thing needs work Christa and Kristin in London now as well :( health, fitness Numbers seem to have gone up pretty well, picked a straightforward lifting plan and I do thinkg my muscles were looking better than ever. Lost control of bodyfast halfway through the year. Bench was at like 170 or something I think I saw, can’t wait to pick it back up Was bicycling a shitload, getting good and strong. Hiking muscles still there. Walking up the stairs a lot, lol. Dragging bicycle up the stairs at work. Back muscles feel great, sloluching less. Bring it home in 2019. Intellectual At the beginning of the year I read some great books, in particlar the double knockout of echopraxia and walkaway which totally radicalized me (plus finishing mass movements). I did good work on berkely AI but only finished first class, then learned a shitload of web dev stuff. I remember finally implementing a promise, good for me, that took days and days of banging my head against the wall, and tickling Go a bit. Damn, I was decent at python, I think I was doing a good book on it in hindsight. Also just started learning how to use emacs, for some reason mildly obsessed with it. Also essentialy gave up reddit, twitter, news, for like a solid month or even 2? I feel empowered to keep it up. emotional, spiritual Going to a therapist was great, much more focused values now due to [BROKEN LINK: 0320db0a-05f8-4997-9393-03427ae25920]. That car accident really fucked me over, I will need to work hard to make up lost time in 2019. I think I have been tempered a lot by tammy, and communication has been good, though I was slipping towards the end of the year. Finances I’m kinda scared to look, but at least I got the 10k in the bank now for savings. Managed to sell the car too, nice. Still haven’t been paid for it yet though.

bucket list** Japan with tammy was fun Saw justice Playing drums Other than that… nothign really from my last year yearcompass :(

Six sentences about my past year The wisest decision I made… Stopping tinder The biggest lesson I learned… CANNOT let my guard down - for life, learning, fitness, making friends. Book airbnbs, and tell people. Go out, and make friends! Also, organization keeps clean. Boxes. Everything has a place it belongs, everything is always being put in the place it belongs. Minimize. The biggest risk I took… Motorcycling in Japan, perhaps? The biggest surprise of the year… Making it so close to google? Helmet from Tammy? Lol, chlamydia? The most important thing I did for others… Showed unconditional support for tammy

The biggest thing I completed… Job hunt stuff? Lesson 1 of berkely AI? NERT training? Six questions about my past year What are you the most proud of? Car accident with guy Staying calm while being yelled at in in and out Learning to implement a promise in JS Getting so close to google Re-igniting my journey Big numbers at gym New website Emacs Slightly more self awareness Lots of flashcards Knots Bicycling lots Who are the three people who influenced you the most? tammy Riley gino Who are the three people you influenced the most? Tammy I don’t know… What were you not able to accomplish? So much… Knee down People read my blog Python (good) confidence - although I got pretty good at python, i gave it up throughotu the year Finish berkely AI Secondary source of income LLC Made a song Made an art Worked abroad Had a conversation in chinese Had a conversation in japanese Ate at a michelin starred restaurant (although did eat at uchi and will for my bday this year) Travel tons, camp tons. 15% bodyfat. City-ruling badass Staying extremely close to family (though did better with the memes and texting) Meditate consistently Journal consistently What is the best thing you have discovered about yourself? Still able to adapt/learn/be emotionally intelligent? Further depths about my learning struggles? I have lots more to learn, a much longer journey. Perhaps i can be more fit than I realized. What are you the most grateful for? So much leeway in all aspects of life. My privileges. Money, job, PTO, etc. Hot showers. Tammy. Video games. The best moments Describe the greatest and most memorable, joyful moments from last year. Draw them on this sheet. How did you feel? Who was there with you? What were you doing? What kind of smells, sounds or tastes do you remember?

Motorcycling through Shinjuku. I felt like I was in the fantasy world I had envisaged in many scenarios - tron, akira, etc. The cherry blossoms were gorgeous. Slight misstep feeling liek I had missed them by a week but they were still beautiful. Tammy was with me. Very cold, so many lights, so much response from the bike, such good noise.

Peaceful rainy tea garden with tammy in kyoto. Very good little okashi. How do we foam the tea, lol.

Hearing the rito theme subtly played while cuddling with Tammy.

Seeing the Spacex rocket. Three of my biggest accomplishments List your three greatest accomplishments from last year here. (getting off reddit/twitter/news)

Reigniting my programming journey.

Motorcycling through Japan with hawty motorcycle girlfriend.

Getting the new apartment in SF. What have you done to achieve these? Woke back up from google hitting me up, waking up.

Just doing it. Somehow convincing tammy to come too.

Worked hard to find it. All the things that led to my programming journey.

Who helped you achieve these successes? How? Those google recruiters were great, for waking me up. Everyone that rejected me from other companies. Riley for staying on my case and giving me programming tips.

Tammy enabling my travel. My friends in Japan. Tetsuya, Tatsuya.

Gino for being my roommate. Kailin still for helping me make it here to SF.

Three of my biggest challenges List your three biggest challenges from last year here.

Overcoming depression and anxiety, especially after the accident. Still working on this.

Waking back up, getting into the programming groove. Avoiding listlessness.

Being fat. Lifting to get out of it. Who or what helped you overcome these challenges? Tammy and a bit of family, that therapist I saw for a bit. Gino a tiny bit. Riley a tiny bit.

Reddit for fitness tips. Tammy and Gino both for getting on my ass about eating. What have you learned about yourself while overcoming these challenges? I have to keep trying, hard. I have to keep journaling and trakcing my thoughts and staying mindful. I can’t ever stop weighing myself or being mindful of the food I”m putting in me. I really should find a method for getting new programming done all the time. The train was a good help - going through cracking the coding interview as well. I can obsess over one thing and then drop it instantly. Forgiveness Did anything happen during the past year that still needs to be forgiven? Deeds or words that made you feel bad? Or are you angry with yourself? Write it down here. Do good for yourself and forgive.*

That smash bros phase was weird, but whatever. Trying to commentate lol. Woops chlamydia. Being fat towards the end, letting go towards the end, skipping and losing control Totally giving up on finance tracking (at least the automated processes seem to be managing fine)(still need to get on that) Not doing any photography stuff towards the end Focusing super duper hard on programming at the loss of other hobbies and activities Throwing away the second half of the year Letting go Is there anything else you need to say? Is there anything you must let go of before you can start your next year? Draw or write, then think about it and let it all go.

New year means new chance to rectify mistakes and get going on a whole life. Sort out how to cure / treat this depression and maintain energy. Find a way to get new friends and keep them. Schedule activities, stop hanging around the house like a bum. Be good. The past year in three words Choose three words to define your past year. Front-heavy. Ratchet-slip. Processes. The book of my past year A book was made about your past year*. Write down its title. Slide into your late twenties. Farewell to your last year If there is anything else left that you would like to write down, or there is anybody you would like to say goodbye to, do it now. Dude fat caleb, gtfo. Maintain yourself. You didn’t make google, that sucks. Doesn’t mean the AI journey is over. Reconvene, regroup, keep trying.

The year ahead- 2017 Dare to dream big What does the year ahead of you look like? What will happen in an ideal case? Why will it be great? Write, draw, let go of your expectations and dare to dream.

New job. New focus on becoming a better engineer. Let setbacks be setbacks and keep pushing forward. Lots of new activities, busy weekends, good times. Keeping head above depressive waters. Lots of trips and good vacations. Lots of fun camping. Lots of new and good friends. Getting as much as possible out of life. Great new coworkers, helping set the culture of the new office, making a name for myself. Learning from the mistakes of Electric Imp. This is what my next year will be about Define the most important aspects of next year in the following areas*. Which events will be the most important? Summarize briefly. personal life and family Tammy and I doing fun stuff together. Throwing more parties, making more friends Talking to the family more - probably should call them more. Seeing how colette is doing. Hanging out with people more VIsiting christa and kristin work, studies, profession Staying on point at potato - demonstrating a team-spiritedness, an activeness of the mind, slaying, impressing, blowing shit out of the water Making a name for myself, being a friend to call, dale carnegie, really blow minds Staying on top of studies - python, perhaps Go? Make a game, make something in another programming language, godtier web dev. Get back into AI stuff Object oriented design Algorithms Chinese Japanese belongings (home, objects) Nothing really strikes me as something I”m excited about - more interested in saving money for trips. I do desperately want to keep my place clean - do some removing of stuff, minimalism. Hang the art. Stay clean. Stay organized. relaxation, hobbies, creativity Enjoy my showers but not too much - don’t spend so much time in there. Perhaps get off twitter while in there, should help VIdeo games are ok, don’t spend too much time on them> Maybe check out streaming? Perhaps Drums, more drums. Get better. Possibly explore piano, FLStudio, guitar. I’ve always wanted to, just need to start doing it. Writing, writing lots. That roman empire sci fi thing, start reading and researching Reading, lots.

friends, community More parties, more hanging with people Go out and do stuff health, fitness Make up for the mistakes at the end of last year Tammy wants a thunder down under kind of guy - give it to her Work out every morning before work, stick to the lifting plan, stay focused Try to get bodyfat as low as possible before taiwan Intellectual Read lots, read about roman history and greeks and general human history Stay awake, stay on the game Learn chess? Compete somehow at stuff

emotional, spiritual Meditation Defeating depression Finances Do 401k matching Put lots away Get fat savings bucket list** Visit kristin and christa in london Do another eurotrip? Finish a class or two for that online class thing BLogposts Read fuckloads Git gud at drums Bake more Cook more Involved in community Find things to excite me Magical triplets for the year ahead These three things I will love about myself. Ability to see the bigger picture and maintain a plan for my future, not get tied down or forget the timeline Ability to step back and reason, calm, think about things Ability to stay organized and focused despite how much of a challenge this is I am ready to let go of these three things. Stuffing myself full to shit on weed Ameliorizing loneliness with Tinder Desperately filling time with reddit, twitter, news.ycombinator

These three things I want to achieve the most. Career success - loved by my colleagues, extreme competency, so that I can in the future travel as much as I’d like My thoughts are read by many, heard Progress on AI These three people will be my pillars during rough times. Tammy Family Riley, Graham These three things I will dare to discover. Ability to physically stress myself Ability to be alone, in scary situations, such as camping - the only thing that causes me fear, now? How to change a clutch cable These three things I will have the power to say no to. Excess food Twitter, reddit, news.ycombinator, news in general Losing control of my scleep schedule These three things I will make my surroundings cozy with. Boxes and other ways of organization Plants (plant those tomatoes!) Party snacks to give people Things that make me feel warm so I can comfortably read art These three things I will do every morning. Lift Journal (at night) Meditate (at night) Remind myself of my goals and review them These three things I will pamper myself with regularly. Showeeeeeerrrsss Books that “waste time” Cheese, chocolate? Small bites of delicious food. Just give the rest away! These three places I will visit. London Taipei New York NC? I will connect with my loved ones in these three ways. Sending memes Calling Writing postcards With these three presents will I reward my successes. Vacation abroad Food, cereal perhaps Hot showers Six sentences about my next year This year I will not procrastinate any more to… Get fit Journal tons Blog more Write apps Stay clean, stay organized Keep the house clean Do the dishes Cook when it’s time to cook This year I will draw the most energy from… The impending future, my desire to achieve my goals, my foresight This year, I will be the bravest when… Stepping on the scale Challenging myself at work, staying focused Working with Tammy when I think she’s wrong This year I will say yes when… People wanna go out People wanna hang People invite me to stuff I find an opportunity to hang, and consider whether I should invite people I wonder if I should workout today I wonder if I should go to bed on time This year I advise myself to… Keep it together, re-read goals and state them clearly. Stay on top of the discipline -during the week, go to bed on time so you can wake up and make it to the gym before work. Try to get there 5 days a week as much as possible, the progress will be remarkable Stay on top of the journal, it really helps remember stuff and get the thoughts of out the head, which provides clarity, and helps to remember the things that have occured Stay off news, twitter, reddit, news.ycombinator Dont be a dick Don’t slip into depression This year will be special for me because… I’m really growing up, and I have seen highs and lows for me. Now, only stretch for greater highs. My word for the year ahead Pick a word to symbolize and define the year ahead. You can look at this word if you need some extra energy, so you remember not to give up your dreams. Masterfully done

Secret wish Unleash your mind. What is your secret wish for the next year?

CLasses make me shitloads of money Lots of rich Fund AI Fund space programs Wake up, stay woke up Depression gone forever Clean house all the time, happiness all the time I slay at Potato and scream up the ranks there